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Stress and Grief

March 20, 2013 by Donna Marie

Mum regrets the daughterWe experience pressures in our lives every day and when those pressures start piling up and get to be too much for us to handle we can begin to feel like a stick that is about to break.

When grief from a loss combines with daily stresses the feeling of being overwhelmed can heighten stress and make us feel weak and close to snapping.

Stress can lead to a number of health problems and can zap us of energy and a zest for life. But when we learn how to perceive stress and learn different ways of managing it, we can begin to strengthen and learn how not to break under pressure.

3 KEY Stress Reduction Techniques to Help with Grief

We all have our own ways of dealing with stress, some healthy, some not so healthy. When stress and grief combine after a loss or death it can be significantly harder to choose healthy ways of dealing. While we might feel like shouting at everyone and everything, might be afraid to go to sleep at night and may turn to unhealthy habits to make us feel better, these can all make the problem worse. Some healthier and more productive ways to deal with stress include; meditation and prayer, relaxation and sleep, and healthy eating and exercising.

Meditation and Prayer:

When grieving, our natural instincts often lead us to retreat inside of ourselves. And while reflection can be helpful, we often choose to dwell on what we’ve lost and concentrate on the negative. Instead, spend your time alone practicing relaxation techniques like meditation and prayer.

Relaxation and Sleep:

It’s important for both our bodies and our minds, to help them cope with stress, to establish a consistent sleep pattern: go to bed and get up at the same time every day, make sure you are getting enough sleep (6-8 hours) and allow yourself time to relax before bed. If you are having trouble with this last one, try taking a warm shower or listening to something relaxing before bed.

Eating Healthy and Exercise:

Instead of turning to junk food, alcohol, or other unhealthy habits when stressed, keeps your body at its best by turning to healthy foods and eating habits. It’s also best, though difficult, to keep your body active by participating in 20-30 minutes of exercise a day.

Letting Go:

When we lose someone or find ourselves in an uncomfortable and unfamiliar situation we tend to want to avoid it. Our minds struggle to block it out, unconsciously creating resistance and stress. One of the best ways to deal with grief and stress is to let go of this resistance and become aware of how we are feeling in the present moment.

Humans love to be in control, and when a moment comes that we cannot change or control we become stressed. But in accepting that we cannot change what has happened and becoming aware of our thoughts and breathing, we can begin to de-stress. Try it out slowly, with small things that bother you; become aware of them and how they make you feel, and where they lead your thoughts. Then try it again, and again. It may take practice but letting go can be one of the most effective stress relievers.

Click here for information on Donna’s new healing workshop:  “Grieving Mothers-Grieving Women”, April 27, 2013.

The Holidays are Here: Tips to Deal with Stress

December 7, 2009 by Donna Marie

Lets face it. The holidays are stressful. No matter how you prepare, or how much time and energy you put into readying yourself for the holidays, many holidays will end up being a bit tough for everyone. However, there are many ways you can deal with stress head on during the holiday season!

Many people expect that the holidays have to be perfect, they may run themselves ragged day in and day out trying to create the spot on holiday experience. The first thing to realize is that your holiday does not have to be perfect.

Confronting your ideas about holiday perfection is a great way to begin the process of dealing with holiday stress.  If you and your family are already feeling stressed out by the holiday season, there are a few things you can do to reduce that level of stress and make your holiday season a happier one.

The first thing you can do when dealing with stress around the holidays is to prepare for the situation you might be entering into. If you have known stressors during this season, huge meals to plan, or family members visiting that cause you negativity, take some time to relax. Make sure that in the midst of the hustle and bustle you get to take some “you” time.

If some holiday event does not go as planned, know that it is OK. There is no use getting frustrated with yourself during the holiday season.

Many people create undue stress for themselves when planning gifts for others. Remind yourself that whatever you give will be perfect. For most people, just the thought that someone is thinking about them enough to give them something is what really matters.

To deal with stress of the holidays, you must prepare yourself. There are many built in stressors lurking out there, like extra food and drinks, or not enough sleep. Know that this time, like many other difficult times of the year, you need to make sure to give your body what it needs.

Make sure to eat healthy when you can, which will allow you to enjoy holiday meals with family. Make sure to exercise regularly, which is known to reduce your stress levels dramatically. Make sure you are sleeping enough every night. Practice saying “no” when you have over extended yourself.

Yes, the holidays can be trying times, but times that will be filled with love, happiness and fun. Just double check that you deal with stress before it gets the better of you, and you will be well on your way to a happy holiday season!

About Donna

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Donna Marie, a consultant, confidante, and champion of stress reduction, has developed a host of effective, easy techniques proven to retrain both the brain’s and body’s responses to stress.  Read More

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