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Stress and Grief

March 20, 2013 by Donna Marie

Mum regrets the daughterWe experience pressures in our lives every day and when those pressures start piling up and get to be too much for us to handle we can begin to feel like a stick that is about to break.

When grief from a loss combines with daily stresses the feeling of being overwhelmed can heighten stress and make us feel weak and close to snapping.

Stress can lead to a number of health problems and can zap us of energy and a zest for life. But when we learn how to perceive stress and learn different ways of managing it, we can begin to strengthen and learn how not to break under pressure.

3 KEY Stress Reduction Techniques to Help with Grief

We all have our own ways of dealing with stress, some healthy, some not so healthy. When stress and grief combine after a loss or death it can be significantly harder to choose healthy ways of dealing. While we might feel like shouting at everyone and everything, might be afraid to go to sleep at night and may turn to unhealthy habits to make us feel better, these can all make the problem worse. Some healthier and more productive ways to deal with stress include; meditation and prayer, relaxation and sleep, and healthy eating and exercising.

Meditation and Prayer:

When grieving, our natural instincts often lead us to retreat inside of ourselves. And while reflection can be helpful, we often choose to dwell on what we’ve lost and concentrate on the negative. Instead, spend your time alone practicing relaxation techniques like meditation and prayer.

Relaxation and Sleep:

It’s important for both our bodies and our minds, to help them cope with stress, to establish a consistent sleep pattern: go to bed and get up at the same time every day, make sure you are getting enough sleep (6-8 hours) and allow yourself time to relax before bed. If you are having trouble with this last one, try taking a warm shower or listening to something relaxing before bed.

Eating Healthy and Exercise:

Instead of turning to junk food, alcohol, or other unhealthy habits when stressed, keeps your body at its best by turning to healthy foods and eating habits. It’s also best, though difficult, to keep your body active by participating in 20-30 minutes of exercise a day.

Letting Go:

When we lose someone or find ourselves in an uncomfortable and unfamiliar situation we tend to want to avoid it. Our minds struggle to block it out, unconsciously creating resistance and stress. One of the best ways to deal with grief and stress is to let go of this resistance and become aware of how we are feeling in the present moment.

Humans love to be in control, and when a moment comes that we cannot change or control we become stressed. But in accepting that we cannot change what has happened and becoming aware of our thoughts and breathing, we can begin to de-stress. Try it out slowly, with small things that bother you; become aware of them and how they make you feel, and where they lead your thoughts. Then try it again, and again. It may take practice but letting go can be one of the most effective stress relievers.

Click here for information on Donna’s new healing workshop:  “Grieving Mothers-Grieving Women”, April 27, 2013.

Mindfulness Meditation: Consciously Relax and De-Stress

February 18, 2010 by Donna Marie

Are you ready to tackle stressors in your life? Are you looking for a way to deal with day to day hurdles that get in your way? There are many simple techniques to keep the stress from piling up, but the key to all of them is mindfulness.

Mindfulness is being aware in the moment. Too often our lives fly by on hyperspeed and we can barely remember how we feel, what we did that day or when the last time was that we took some time for ourselves. It is very important to stay in the moment at all times.

Mindfulness can help in numerous aspects of our lives, especially while dealing with stress. Mindfulness, when paired with relaxation, visualization and meditation, can be the keys to leading a life that is much calmer and more connected.

Begin by taking some time every day to focus on yourself. If you need to get up a little earlier, or use part of your lunch break- do it! It is easy to spend too much time focusing on others, be it family, friends or co workers, and we usually forget that we should be number one. It is time now to focus on yourself!

Take some time to do some deep breathing and focus on the day ahead of you. Think about events that may be causing you stress in the future. By focusing on events, mindfully, piece by piece, the stressor won’t seem so large, but instead will become manageable. If there is a specific situation that causes you anxiety, playing out how the situation will go in a positive way creates a higher likelihood that you will feel less stressed in a given situation!

Also use some of your personal time to do some deep breathing. Find a comfortable place to sit or lay down. After you have thought about things that may be coming up in your day, try to clear your mind of anything that may be causing you undue negativity. Studies have found that people who relax and meditate on a regular basis not only have lower levels of stress, but are healthier over all!

You too can tackle any problem or situation head on by planning it out in your head. When you enter a stressful situation, think back to the planning you did before hand. You will find that many of those situations become easier to deal with. By taking a few simple steps to relax and take some time to simply focus on you, you will soon find that you are on your way to having decreased stress on a regular basis.

About Donna

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Donna Marie, a consultant, confidante, and champion of stress reduction, has developed a host of effective, easy techniques proven to retrain both the brain’s and body’s responses to stress.  Read More

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