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Stress and Grief

March 20, 2013 by Donna Marie

Mum regrets the daughterWe experience pressures in our lives every day and when those pressures start piling up and get to be too much for us to handle we can begin to feel like a stick that is about to break.

When grief from a loss combines with daily stresses the feeling of being overwhelmed can heighten stress and make us feel weak and close to snapping.

Stress can lead to a number of health problems and can zap us of energy and a zest for life. But when we learn how to perceive stress and learn different ways of managing it, we can begin to strengthen and learn how not to break under pressure.

3 KEY Stress Reduction Techniques to Help with Grief

We all have our own ways of dealing with stress, some healthy, some not so healthy. When stress and grief combine after a loss or death it can be significantly harder to choose healthy ways of dealing. While we might feel like shouting at everyone and everything, might be afraid to go to sleep at night and may turn to unhealthy habits to make us feel better, these can all make the problem worse. Some healthier and more productive ways to deal with stress include; meditation and prayer, relaxation and sleep, and healthy eating and exercising.

Meditation and Prayer:

When grieving, our natural instincts often lead us to retreat inside of ourselves. And while reflection can be helpful, we often choose to dwell on what we’ve lost and concentrate on the negative. Instead, spend your time alone practicing relaxation techniques like meditation and prayer.

Relaxation and Sleep:

It’s important for both our bodies and our minds, to help them cope with stress, to establish a consistent sleep pattern: go to bed and get up at the same time every day, make sure you are getting enough sleep (6-8 hours) and allow yourself time to relax before bed. If you are having trouble with this last one, try taking a warm shower or listening to something relaxing before bed.

Eating Healthy and Exercise:

Instead of turning to junk food, alcohol, or other unhealthy habits when stressed, keeps your body at its best by turning to healthy foods and eating habits. It’s also best, though difficult, to keep your body active by participating in 20-30 minutes of exercise a day.

Letting Go:

When we lose someone or find ourselves in an uncomfortable and unfamiliar situation we tend to want to avoid it. Our minds struggle to block it out, unconsciously creating resistance and stress. One of the best ways to deal with grief and stress is to let go of this resistance and become aware of how we are feeling in the present moment.

Humans love to be in control, and when a moment comes that we cannot change or control we become stressed. But in accepting that we cannot change what has happened and becoming aware of our thoughts and breathing, we can begin to de-stress. Try it out slowly, with small things that bother you; become aware of them and how they make you feel, and where they lead your thoughts. Then try it again, and again. It may take practice but letting go can be one of the most effective stress relievers.

Click here for information on Donna’s new healing workshop:  “Grieving Mothers-Grieving Women”, April 27, 2013.

Begin the Day with Mindfulness Meditation to Calm Stress at Work

July 13, 2010 by Donna Marie

The work climate is sometimes a difficult one, and many people may find it hard to cope with the pressure of dealing with stress while at their job. It makes sense. Most people spend the majority of their day at their job, and the stressors of co-workers, bosses, and  looming projects and deadlines sometimes contribute to a difficult working environment.

It’s easy for a small issue at work to become a larger one very quickly, and if you don’t take time to deal with stress at work as it comes, you might find yourself feeling the pressure. While dealing with stress at work may seem like an insurmountable obstacle, it is one that can be easily overcome simply by adding a few  simple steps to your day.

In the morning, when you wake up, think about your morning routine. Is there any time for you to stop and give thanks for the blessings you already have in your life? Most people jump from task to task to task throughout their day, and never have even ten minutes to stop and think about things they can be grateful for. Stopping and taking some time to ruminate and give thanks is called Mindfullness Meditation.

Simply reminding yourself of the good things will help you not focus your energy and attention on the negative aspects. Take ten minutes every morning to practice Mindfullness Meditation, and you will quickly see the benefit this practice can have on  your day to day life.

You need to make it your goal to not sweat the little things. When confronted with a difficult or stressful situation while at your job, take time to think before you react. Think back to your morning practice of Mindfulness Meditation. By channeling the positive energy you brought with you from the morning, you will be able to deflate some of the mounting frustrations that may arise while on the job.

Remember that everyone deals with their own stressors in different ways, and sometimes their reactions may have nothing do with you. Mindfulness Meditation can be a good addition to your morning routine and can help you when dealing with stress at work.

Choose Mindfulness Meditation When Stressed by Difficult Co-Workers

April 16, 2010 by Donna Marie

Dealing with difficult co-workers in the workplace can add increased stress to anyone’s life. Everyone knows that  one person in their office that they may find it difficult to communicate with. Maybe this is a co-worker who constantly tries to trump you in the office. Perhaps it’s a boss that doesn’t lead successfully, or an assistant that you simply cannot see eye to eye with.

Day to day pressures become more intense, conversations with these individuals can become more strained, and the relationship can begin taking a toll on your work performance. Don’t allow these negative relationships to take over your life! Begin by dealing with stress in the workplace in a positive way!

The first  suggestion on dealing with stress in the workplace is to begin practicing Mindful Meditation. Mindful Meditation is a quick and easy way to relax your body and mind, while additionally creating a space that is incredible positive.

Start and end your day with some simple thoughts of what you are grateful for. Try to clear your mind of any negative energy, and surround yourself with positive energy. When you know that you have to interact with this person at work, prepare yourself. Realize that you may become frustrated, but that no situation will be insurmountable. Take a few moments to use Mindfulness Meditation here as well.

First think of the positives. Then you can begin by playing the conversation you are about to have in your mind. Now analyze what part of this conversation might cause you undue stress. Prepare your answers in advance. This way, if the stressful situation does arrive, you will already be prepared.

Next, think about different ways you might be able to communicate with this individual. Finding the best method of communication with difficult co workers is a terrific step in dealing with stress at work. For example, if face to face contact causes a more intense reaction, try communicating mostly over email, or over the phone. If you feel calmer in the morning, try scheduling meetings or talks with this co-worker at that time.

If your other co-workers spend time talking negatively about the office, or specific individuals, choose not to participate. Try to remain as positive about your co-workers and your working environment as you can. The more positive energy you can bring to your job, the easier it will be to deal with the stress at work that does occur in a less taxing manner.

There are many ways in which you can turn a difficult relationship into a positive one. Taking simple steps to relax yourself, practice mindfulness meditation, and carefully choose your method of communication, can have you well on your way to a more upbeat and productive working environment.

About Donna

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Donna Marie, a consultant, confidante, and champion of stress reduction, has developed a host of effective, easy techniques proven to retrain both the brain’s and body’s responses to stress.  Read More

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