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Donna Marie Consulting

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Deal with Stress During the Holidays

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It is that time of year again; that whirlwind of gift-giving holidays, marketing blitzes, holiday parties and activities galore that begins right after Halloween, builds to Thanksgiving, and continues gaining momentum through the end of the year.  For many this is the most favorite time of the year, but for others it is filled with pressure and stress.  My strategy for dealing with stress during the holidays is simple, “do less and be more”.

FAMILY STRESS
The holiday season is also a time when many of us spend time with family members that we may only see once or twice a year.  Seeing people that may emotionally charge us is one of the biggest holiday stressors.  Before seeing those individuals that cause you stress, take time to do some deep meditative breathing.  Think about the situations that may arise and bring you stress, contemplate what you may do differently in this situation instead of your typical reaction to this stressful person.  While breathing think about what it is that you are thankful for.  By finding something to be grateful for it crowds out other feelings of resentment and annoyance.  Another option is to reduce time spent with certain family members if you find it too uncomfortable.  Give yourself permission to strongly consider this.

LESS IS MORE
When we over-do we spread ourselves too thin and we are left feeling frazzled.  It is easy during this time of year to fill up your schedule with every holiday party that you are invited to.  Commit to less events and the truly enjoy the people at the ones you attend.  Being with friends, family and co-workers at this time of year is what the season is all about anyways.

HOLIDAY SPENDING
With the marketing promotions out there it is hard to resist spending and buying.  There is no reason to finance your holidays for the next six months, which will inevitably cause more stress down the road.  Be reasonable with holiday spending.  You can also tell your children/family members that you are setting a limit on spending for each because that is the responsible thing to do. You can ask them what type of gift(s) they would like within your holiday budget. This also gives them choices.  Keep in mind that you are demonstrating financial responsibility and boundaries to others and avoiding later debt and stress.

GIVING TO THOSE IN NEED
Please remember the ones who are truly in need of holiday cheer this time of year; don’t forget to donate to local charities. If you feel moved to help feed the hungry in metro Detroit, Gleaners Food Bank, a wonderful organization allows for online donations.  http://www.gcfb.org   There are many hungry people that will not have the spread of holiday foods we may take for granted.

Above all, this holiday season to take time to be present to all of the wonderful people in your life; time passes by much too quickly.  Enjoy the time that you do have with those in your life that bring you joy.

Blessings to you and your families,

Donna Marie

Stay Connected to Reduce Your Fear of Public Speaking

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puzzleAn important part of public speaking is interacting with your audience. Many people focus only on the writing of the speech, but fail to consider the delivery. One very important part of delivering your speech is your one on one connection with your audience. By practicing connecting to audience members you can help remove your fear of public speaking.

Much of the fear comes from the unknown, and not knowing everyone in your audience can bring up some stress or fear. To help overcome this, practice giving your speech in front of friends, family or co-workers and getting a positive response. The more times you practice initially the easier it will be to give your speech when the real day comes.

Practice connecting to one individual at a time. Some people feel uncomfortable with giving eye contact directly to those in the audience, but the more you practice looking someone in the eye, the easier it becomes. Even if you are far away from them, the audience will feel that personal connection, and will continue to pay attention. Make sure you do not just look at the front row but speak to all of the rows of people, even those in the back.

Anyone who may be focused on too much can feel on the spot, but saying a few sentences to each person can make the whole audience part of the experience. Here are a few other things to consider when you are giving your speech.

Interruptions can happen during any speech. There could be crying babies, movement in and out of the room, or cell phones that may go off. Preparing for any interruptions that may occur can remove this stress. Do not stop your talk for any reason. By acting unphased by these possible distractions, your audience will remain focused on the speech as well.

Also, be aware of your body language. It’s easy when nervous to have a stiff body or awkward gestures. Practice saying your speech in front of a mirror so that you can see what gestures you normally do, and how you can make your body look even more relaxed the whole time you are delivering your speech.

When it comes to the day of the speech, remember to stick to the flow of your speech and it will all go smoothly. Do your best to stay in the moment at all times. Do not get lost in your thoughts or in any worries you might have. Focus on your points, and sticking to your script, and your speech will be a success.

Mindfulness: Two Powerful Techniques to Reduce Your Stress at Work

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Have you found yourself becoming more stressed out then usual? Stress, especially in the workplace, can occur for many reasons. Most people fly through life very quickly, not taking time to slow down and enjoy their lives, but simply push through one day to the next.

Moving through the workday at this speed does not allow you the time needed to process any of the daily ups and downs you might encounter during your workday. Dealing with stress at work is an important skill set to cultivate. The more you take the time to work through the minor stressors at work, the easier it will be for you to let each little work incident go, and the happier you will be overall with your job and work situation.

One important thing you can do when it comes to dealing with stress at work, is to give thanks as often as you can. This is a practice called Mindfulness Meditation.

Being aware, in your body, and living life moment to moment, gives you the ability to be thankful for what you have, and analyze the situation around you before responding. Mindfullness Meditation is a wonderful way to relax your mind and your body at the beginning and end of the day.

Another way you can deal with stress at work is to accept that there are certain things in your life that are not within your control. You can’t control assignments you are given, an individuals opinion of you, the hours you have to work every day- but you can make huge strides towards feeling stress free by accepting that there are some things that you personally cannot change.

Instead you can focus more specifically on things that are within your control. You can control how you react in a certain situation, how you communicate with your boss or co-workers, and how much time you give yourself daily to relax and reflect.

Thinking through the things that are within your power to control, gives you the ability to deal with stress at work in a proactive and productive way.

Begin the Day with Mindfulness Meditation to Calm Stress at Work

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The work climate is sometimes a difficult one, and many people may find it hard to cope with the pressure of dealing with stress while at their job. It makes sense. Most people spend the majority of their day at their job, and the stressors of co-workers, bosses, and  looming projects and deadlines sometimes contribute to a difficult working environment.

It’s easy for a small issue at work to become a larger one very quickly, and if you don’t take time to deal with stress at work as it comes, you might find yourself feeling the pressure. While dealing with stress at work may seem like an insurmountable obstacle, it is one that can be easily overcome simply by adding a few  simple steps to your day.

In the morning, when you wake up, think about your morning routine. Is there any time for you to stop and give thanks for the blessings you already have in your life? Most people jump from task to task to task throughout their day, and never have even ten minutes to stop and think about things they can be grateful for. Stopping and taking some time to ruminate and give thanks is called Mindfullness Meditation.

Simply reminding yourself of the good things will help you not focus your energy and attention on the negative aspects. Take ten minutes every morning to practice Mindfullness Meditation, and you will quickly see the benefit this practice can have on  your day to day life.

You need to make it your goal to not sweat the little things. When confronted with a difficult or stressful situation while at your job, take time to think before you react. Think back to your morning practice of Mindfulness Meditation. By channeling the positive energy you brought with you from the morning, you will be able to deflate some of the mounting frustrations that may arise while on the job.

Remember that everyone deals with their own stressors in different ways, and sometimes their reactions may have nothing do with you. Mindfulness Meditation can be a good addition to your morning routine and can help you when dealing with stress at work.